Memory of Form 3

Alright, I am writing now. See, Mr. Lai? However I am not actually writing all because you want me to but somehow I have something to share.

Well, form 3 terms have eventually ended and of course everyone must be happy to have thier summer vacation FINALLY. Despite the outbreak of swine flu, the school Principal still insisted us going back to school in the previous weeks. What's the point of doing that when we had nothing left to do but playing some stupid games, hanging around and having some boring talks in school hall? Anyway I wasn't happy. I felt damn nervous and started getting nightmares all those weeks. I thought I was beaten by Cherry this time since she had done so well in subjects like P.E, music, C.I.T....etc. Plus, many people said she might surpass me. However, I had done so well in main subjects like Mathematics, Science, Liberal Studies...... And maybe as the weights of main subjects were larger than those of music, PE etc, I got higher average mark and beat her by chance.

Think more deeply, this year is actually the best academic year i have had ever since I entered this secondary school. We did have fun together. Plus, people treated me better than last year. I hate Matthew though, 'cause he always teases me. But that's when I understood something. People like Matthew get their happiness by teasing or making others sad/embarassed, but they never know what they actually get is hatred. Whenever Matthew teases me, I hate him more. And what I have found out is that not only me has been teased by him but a lot of other classmates who now hate him as much as I do. I don't really see why teasing can make one so happy when the happiness brought is only for one individual. Happiness is supposed to be shared and it should never bring the existance of sorrow at the same time. In Matthew's case, he is happy when others are not. He gets the sole happiness for his own, which is a really terrible manner. However, when I think about what I have done through this year, I also remember teasing Michelle Tam myself. People are like that. When you get teased, you feel as if you really understand the feelings of those who almost get teased by everyone everyday. For instance, when I was teased by Matthew or other boys, I felt as if I was on the same boat with Michelle, even though i didn't really like her. It just appeared as if we were the same kind of people at that moment since both of us were teased. However, once I was in the group again (Like when I was accepted by the others or not teased by people), I would forget how I had felt the time I had been teased but join the others and tease Michelle. It was ridiculous though I didn't know why. I think it's something I must try to get rid of. Something I should never do. Something as bad as hurting someone intentionally. Wait....teasing is a motion done intentionally right? So we were all WRONG at the first time. We all were. At least now I always try not to tease her. Actually I have been quite good to her. I never hit or bullied her, unlike people like Fatima <----no offence. Fatima always tells me not to tease or bully michelle, but when I try to talk to her, she will say "What? You are talking to Michelle?" I don't really see the point. I mean she has once told me not to tease Michelle but then she just asks me not to talk to her. Also, when she sat with Michelle, they always fought. Once Michelle even told me she hates Fatima to death. Oh My God....................... Apart from Fatima, other non-chinese also took part in bullying Michelle. I remember there was a time when they stood together and told lies to teacher about Michelle, making everything look as if they were all Michelle's faults. In my memory, this part was the worst part Michelle had ever been through. The teacher believed the non-chinese because there were so many of them standing up for each other when Michelle was just Michelle....Alone...facing everything alone. Sometimes I really appreciate her bravey and determination. She never wants to lose to anything once she's set a goal on it (Not about academic) The desperation and the nerve of her appeared the most impressive things about her to me this year. She never tries to lose to herself. She stands up for herself even though she knows very well there is only her and that nobody is there to offer any assistance. But still, she never gives up. She insists on finding justice for herself. And that really makes me......well......feel kind of ashamed. I mean why do we have to hurt somebody like this, who is actually brave and determined but has nobody to support her? Why?

Another thing I want to share is about friendship. This year I met Yonnie and we became best friends. Even now, I can hardly believe we are the same kind of persons. We like to laugh and have fun. Things I find interesting also make her laugh, when it doesn't really appear funny to other people. Together we have laughed for thousands times and I feel really glad to have met her. She is my best friend and the sole soulmate, which I am sure of.

Well, here goes Why Wong. I remember in the first term we still hated each other so much. We fought and competed almost anytime at any place. Though I forgot how it happened. We just....well...somehow became friends, maybe because we both got teased by Matthew. But actually it should be we both carried the same goal-------- Try our best to do the best so as to reach the best. Still, I don't hate him anymore now, for somehow I also pity him. He shows off so much that many people hate him. I guess the number of people hating him is more than that of people hating me. Plus he never knows he is hated and teased by so many people, so I get kinds sorry for him.

For Fatima, we are still good friends though she's got some personalities I dislike. However, she is still the person whom I first met when I entered this school. We still chat with each other and sometimes sit together. She is smart, which I have to admit. She can actually do better than she is right now if she really concerns her acadmic work. Never mind.....we are in the same class next year, and then next next year........next next next year too.......then that will become six, the number of years we have studied together since form 1.

Now Matthew and Michelle. It's strange. I treat both of them as my friends when I sometimes hate them very much. I hate it when Matthew teases me. I hate it when Michelle tells lies and talks non-sense. However, both of them have got a kind heart inside, which is true. They both know how to stand up for friends. And sometimes, Michelle also entertains me, with her words, with what she says. She's got brillant ideas and creativities, which, though, aren't used on learning. I once saw her sketch book (Not peeking or anything, she showed it to me), and I was surprised by what she had drawn. They were creative drawing even if they were not like the gorgeous cartoon girls drawn by Cindy. The clothes had got some special patterns only able to be come up with by Michelle. Her ideas were cool, which I had to admit. Next year, she will repeat in form3, which i feel kind of....well......pitying her. Never mind. But the concern is on Matthew. He's actually got into 4J. Oh My God, I don't want it, not being teased by him again!

Finally comes Szi Yong and the teachers. Szi Yong is a really good and cool friend. I like him <-----no stupid thoughts like love or relationship. We are friends and he has actually given me lots of inspiration when I felt perplexed. Once I asked him "Should I give my place to Cherry?" He, of course, asked back "Why?", and I said, "because she's got talent, she's really smart and pretty..." But what came next were never expected. He encouraged me and told me never to lose to her and so on....which really made me feel confident again, for at that time I felt down since I hadn't been doing well in some academic work. I have to thank him because I won again this time and part of it, though very small, was because of his effective and friendly encouragement. And I really wish we would still be good friends next year (Which i am actually sure of 'cause we have just played games on msn today). For teachers, I will have my special thanks to my class teachers. This year my Chinese has been improved and Mr. Lai actually lead a helping hand in that. For Ms Wong, she is just as kind as always. I love having her as my class teacher plus English teacher. And I really wish she would be my English teacher next year.

Well, time's running out. I think I have had enough farewells for this year. Got to go, hope you really enjoy my sharings.